HIGH POINT, N.C. — The holiday season often brings us back to things such as joy, family and celebration. For a High Point mother, this time of year reminds her of what she's lost.
Nicholas Snead vanished around Christmas about two years ago and was later found dead.
His mom opened up with WFMY News 2's Sydni Moore for the first time since police found her son and shared how she plans to honor him.
She started her story on the day Nicholas was born.
Mothers prepare day in and day out for the arrival of their newborn baby.
"When I had him, I remember when the doctor put him on my chest," Nicole Snead said.
But there's nothing that can prepare a parent for the pain of losing a child far too soon.
"I could be down but I promise you the sun will just come up and it will directly shine in my face and he will say 'I’m here mama,'" Nicole Snead said.
Nicholas Snead, known to loved ones as Nick, would have been 23 in February.
"I miss his presence. It was so full. It was so loud," Nicole Snead said.
It's been nearly two years since he was found dead in his car in Buffalo Creek near Holden Road. A road in Greensboro his mother Nicole Snead drives on often.
"I don't want to walk away from what happen. Although it's real but it doesn't feel real," Nicole Snead said.
Nick's disappearance stirred up a search party in 2022 after he went missing two days before Christmas. His mother said his location pinged near Holden Road, but he was still nowhere to be found.
"We passed that embankment location well over probably 30 times I’m sure it was," Nicole Snead said.
The search went on for about two weeks, until suddenly in January, police got a call from a driver who noticed a car overturn down the embankment. A call Nicole Snead was grateful for.
"I’d like to thank him if he is watching this, thank you," Nicole Snead said.
She believes that the call was nothing but an answered prayer.
"The day before he seen the car it was a nationwide prayer that night and it was so many people," Nicole Snead said.
Nick's death was ruled a traffic accident by the Greensboro Police Department. Investigators say his car lost control eventually ending up in the creek.
Nicole said speed and wet weather played a part in the crash.
"A lot of us parents have lost our kids to accidents. You are entitled to get mad at them. They’re not here to hear it but you can get mad at them because I would be like Nick, Why did you do that?" Nicole Snead explained.
The tragic incident is now leaving a mother to spend another Christmas without her first-born son.
"I can feel like the shifting of my spirit, I know that it is approaching," Nicole Snead said.
She's thankful for the loved ones by her side every day to help her heal including Nick's cousin Atoya McCray.
"Nick was more than my cousin, he was kind of almost like a son, little brother type to me. He was the big brother to my kids," McCray said.
Like Nick's mother, McCray holds on to memories to remind her of the "family person" Nick truly was.
"One summer he spent the whole summer at my house. I called his mom, 'Don’t you want your son back?' He did not want to leave," McCray said.
To this day, family and friends often visit Holden Road to clean it.
"This is what we are doing, giving back for his memory to stay alive," Nicole Snead said.
And while Nick may not physically be here with loved ones, a memorial sits in his mother's living room reminding her he'll always be near.
Nicole Snead said a foundation has been created in Nick's honor called "Sincerely Nicholas". She says growing up, Nick was bullied, so the foundation is to support those who have gone through a similar experience.