KING, N.C. — Leah Miller almost always smiles when she talks about her oldest son Carson. He's one of the reasons she wanted more kids.
"Carson was always a happy kid. I think that's why we had another one because he was perfect," said Miller.
When you become a mother for the first time, your world changes. Things that were important may not be any longer. Things you never thought about before, suddenly become critical in your life.
“You want to protect them from the world and give them as much love as you can,” said Miller.
A couple of years later, Carson would get a little brother. Sylis was the 2nd child Miller and her husband had.
“He’s very active, very energetic, he’s the smartest kid I’ve ever met, he’s amazing,” said Miller.
At the time, Miller was a stay at home mom and would spend all day and almost every day with the two boys. In the summer, the three of them would often go to her husband’s grandparent’s house to swim.
“We were there all the time. I felt like there was a family there all around, all the time and we all had our eyes on them,” said Miller.
One day, Miller and the boys, along with their grandparents, were swimming in the pool. Miller and the boys hopped out for a bit so Sylis could get a clean diaper and Carson could get a snack.
"I just remember turning around (after changing Sylis) and seeing Carson in the pool,” said Miller. “My mother-in-law was right next to him on a raft."
She said it took a moment to process what was happening.
“I yelled 'get him,'” said Miller.
Carson was floating in the pool face up. He wasn’t breathing.
That same type of fear is what Hailey McDaniel would experience. The mother of two boys bought an old cow trough that turned into a small swimming pool for Gannon and Keegan.
“Not a lot of water in it maybe two feet at the most,” said McDaniel.
Her boys loved splashing around in the water during the summer and could spend hours in the little pool. The idea of a pool scared McDaniel a bit, but this seemed safe.
Last summer, the boys were playing in the water one day.
“I was about 4 to 5 feet away from them talking to my dad,” said McDaniel. “I looked over and saw Gannon playing and splashing in the water and Keegan is on his stomach flat down in the water.”
"Unless you’ve been through an experience like this you have no idea what it feels like. To see your child in the water, unable to swim and not moving, when I saw that I rushed over to him and I jumped in fully clothed and pulled him out,” said McDaniel.
Miller shared that exact same feeling. Watching her child floating - eyes staring blankly at the sky - she panicked.
“I was on the phone with 911, I just kept saying he was supposed to be three in three days,” said Miller. “I remember thinking how long was he there (pool) wanting me to get him, wanting me to come to save him from the water.”
When Carson was pulled from the pool, he wasn’t breathing and did not have a pulse. Paramedics arrived in just minutes and rushed Carson to the hospital.
“I think about that moment, seeing his eyes just staring straight up it was like there was nothing there anymore,” said Miller.
For McDaniel and son Keegan, the news was certainly better. Keegan was coughing and choking almost as soon as his mom pulled him out of the water.
“I am a nurse so the first thing that comes to mind is like medical, like CPR, is he breathing and how does he look,” said McDaniel.
Keegan was going to be okay, but McDaniel still shudders thinking of what could have been if he were underwater a little bit longer.
“I feel like the worst parent, thank God I saw him when I did,” said McDaniel.
While Keegan was alert and aware seconds after being pulled from the water, it was a much different story for Carson. The 2-year-old had to be taken to the hospital by paramedics. His mom rode in the ambulance with him.
“I have to live with the guilt and the panic of what happened, and it takes my breath away,” said Miller. “I have nightmares about it all the time and I don’t tell people about it but I have such vivid nightmares about it that I wake up gasping for air and I have to get up in the middle of the night and just go in his room and make sure he’s there and that I’m still not living in some nightmare.”
In case you’re still wondering - Carson survived and is healthy and happy.
“I can’t imagine not having my baby here,” said Miller. “I want people to understand how fast it can happen.”
Death and injury from drowning happen every day in pools; natural bodies of water; toilets; bathtubs; and even buckets. The statistics are staggering: ten people drown every day for a total of 3,400 each year. It’s a leading cause of accidental death among children of all ages and the single leading cause of injury-related death among children ages one to four.
Although swimming lessons don’t necessarily prevent drowning and are not a substitute for adult supervision, it’s important to teach children to swim. According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, most children age four and older can learn to swim. Children ages one to four might be able to learn to depend on their physical and emotional development. Several organizations, such as the American Red Cross, Boys & Girls Clubs, YMCA's, and municipal and neighborhood pools provide low-cost and even free swimming lessons.
If you would like to learn more about drowning prevention and swim lessons in our community go to this website. You’ll be able to find information about programs, services and a lot more.
The key to preventing these heartbreaking disasters is education and knowledge. Instill a culture of water safety by following these best practices listed below. In most cases, drownings are preventable, according to the website Stop Drowning Now.
Supervise. Never leave children unsupervised near a body of water, including a bath. The families of drowned children know that it can happen in a matter of seconds. If children are near water, you should never presume that someone else is supervising them. Children under age four should be supervised at arm’s length, even if they can swim. Don’t rely on air-filled or foam toys, such as water wings, noodles or inner tubes, to keep children safe.
Learn CPR. All parents and childcare providers should learn cardiopulmonary resuscitation (CPR). Many organizations such as the American Red Cross, fire departments and hospitals offer CPR certification courses.
Avoid alcohol. Don’t drink alcohol when you are boating, swimming or supervising children who are swimming or playing in the water.
Fence in home pools and add alarms. Install a fence at least four feet (1.2 meters) tall that separates the pool area from the house and yard. Install self-closing and self-latching gates that open away from the pool and alarms that sound an alert when someone enters the pool.
Stay in designated areas. At public beaches, swim only in areas set aside for swimming. Pay attention to posted warnings about unsafe swimming conditions. Don’t allow children to swim in drainage ditches, abandoned surface mines or other water-filled areas not intended for swimming.
Watch out for thin ice. Drowning can occur in cold weather, too. Avoid walking, skating or riding on weak or thawing ice. Pay attention to posted warnings regarding ice safety and consult a local department of recreation for current ice conditions.
Keep bathroom doors closed. Install a safety latch or doorknob cover on the outside of the door.
Store buckets and containers safely. Immediately empty buckets and other containers after use. Don’t leave them outside where they might accumulate water.