GREENSBORO, N.C. — Let's face it: sometimes public embarrassment isn't just an accident. Maybe a "friend" cracks a joke about your outfit, a stranger points out a mistake you made, or someone decides to single you out for no reason at all. That stinging feeling of being put down in public is another beast. So, how do we handle those situations when someone tries to steal our shine?
When someone publicly embarrasses you, it often has more to do with them than you. They might feel insecure about themselves and try bringing you down to feel better. Maybe they're jealous, or maybe they're going through something tough and lashing out. Or, perhaps you said something or did something, and they're lashing out at you instead of talking to you about it. Embarrassing you is a way to make you feel their hurt.
It's important to get control of your emotions from public embarrassment for many reasons. First, getting control of your emotions puts you in control of the situation and takes away their power. Second, regaining control of your feelings helps you assess the situation and choose the most effective response. Third, it protects you from further negativity because you're not feeding into their negativity.
Here are a few tips to help you handle the embarrassment. Take a deep breath to help you control your emotions and think about what to do. You can ask them to repeat what they just said. You can say, "What did you just say?" By asking them to repeat it, you're putting them on defense, which makes them think about their actions. You can set a boundary by saying you don't appreciate the comment. And you can stop the conversation by not participating in it. You can say, "I'm not interested in talking to you right now." Or "I'm not interested in continuing this conversation."
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